The older I get the more I understand I am not always a nice person. I have hurt others with my words and actions knowingly and unknowingly. And what better than knowing that the beauty of growing up is outgrowing the shell people know and tapping into a better, content version of yourself?
The older I get the more it dawns on me that adulting is not a bed of roses-at least not the flowers, but occasionally have gratitude magic, you will find a rose here and there.
The older I get I realise that I need the laser sharp focus of monks and the calmness of a yogi because it is a noisy world and my spirit was not made for all these noises.
The older I get the more I realise that life doesn’t end when you fail once, twice, thrice, a million. It is not tragic when you try and lose a million times, it is tragic when you don’t try.
The older I get the more I ponder on the philosophy of Stoicism. I want to be calm when the world wants me to burn it down. I want to be calm when the anger inside boils to the brim and finds its way out, burning my throat and spewing little fires out.I want to learn to control all that is within my control and find happiness in the fact that what I cannot control I should not worry about.
The older I get, I want to honour God and the people of this world.
The older I get, I realise true admiration comes from within. I do not want to buy validation from the world when I cannot give myself a pat on the shoulder every time I look in the mirror.
The older I get, I realise I am not capable of loving another person unconditionally when I cannot love myself. Do you love because you have love in your heart to give or do you love because you are just looking for someone to show you the love you think you have?
The older I get, I realise I am riding a rollercoaster every day. Regardless, I am grateful for this ride, the ups, the downs. I want to feel content with all I have, with the people I have, with all I am going to be and everything in between.
And maybe the older we get the more we want to feel like a child,-to be a child one more time, to feel the joys, the fright, the longing, the dreams, the nightmares. To tell our younger self that they will be okay : )
Tireito 
Leave a comment